Book Review: Practicing Affirmation

I’ve had this book in the que for a few weeks, but finally decided it was time to pick up Practicing Affirmation by Sam Crabtree.  I honestly chuckled a bit as I imagined a book that would require me to stand in front of a mirror and talk about how special I was!  Actually, I knew this book would be a great asset to me as I strive to learn how to better make people feel appreciated.  I know what a huge encouragement it is to me when someone affirms something that I have done or something in my character.  My desire is to be that same source of encouragement and affirmation to others.

The point of this book is to point people towards Jesus.  The whole idea is that when we affirm others, we should do that out of appreciation for how God is using that person for His glory and the good of others.  I should look for ways to affirm how I see God at work in those around me.  Even when I might struggle with acceptance of someone’s performance, I can always find something to affirm in the way that God created them.

This book is a great tool for leaders.  My hope is that God would grow this quality in me so that I might be known for affirming others in a way that would cause them to want to run harder after Christ.

Below I have listed some things that I highlighted while reading…

  • When our mouths are empty of praise for others, it is probably because our hearts are full of love for self.
  • God is glorified in us when we affirm the work he has done and is doing in others.
  • We can sin in two ways: by idolatrous commendation, or by failing to commend the commendable. The challenge for us is to not sin in either direction.Good affirmations are God-centered, pointing to the image of God in a person.
  • Before being able to affirm people well, we need to learn to affirm God, the source of everything to be affirmed in people.
  • God is not given the praise he deserves when we ignore or deny the work he is doing in people.
  • Just as the heavens are declaring the glory of God, if only we have eyes to see it, when we commend the character of a person, we are also pointing to the glory of God from which that character is derived—if we have eyes to see it!
  • We should be noticing evidence of his grace and affirming it.
  • I pray desperately for wisdom and love, for they are far from my nature. I am a fool, and a selfish one. But I desire to grow in authentic Godlike wisdom and in genuine love.
  • If anyone but Christ exemplifies any aspect of Christlikeness, it is because Christ enabled him to do it.
  • The Importance of a Key: We might not think a key is the main part of a building. The rooms, the roof, the walls, the doors, the windows, the square footage are more important than the key. But without the key, you can’t have the rest.The key is crucial for gaining access.
  • Do you want your relationships to be more refreshing to you? Then serve up banquets of refreshment for others.
  • Lord, help us act on what we know. Refresh others through our affirmations. Mobilize us to bless that we may obtain a blessing.
  • And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works.” (Heb. 10:24)
  • Yesterday’s refreshment doesn’t refresh permanently. You can’t stockpile freshness.
  • True affirmations are more likely to come out of a truly affirming heart, which is another reason why it’s so important to be going hard after God, working out our salvation with fear and trembling, pursuing holiness, and asking God to transform us from the inside out.
  • Even when someone fails in his performance, there are ways to commend good character.
  • We are saved by grace alone through faith alone in Christ alone on the authority of the Scriptures alone, not by developing character qualities.
  • We are called not only to avoid bad speech, but to utter good speech.
  • “And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that having all sufficiency in all things at all times, you may abound in every good work” (2 Cor. 9:8).
  • We are gracious to all because God is: “But I say to you, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven. For he makes his sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust” (Matt. 5:44–45).
  • Affirmation is truthfully declaring by complimentary word or action the goodness of something. Good affirmation attests, certifies, or confirms that which honors God, that which is morally upright.
  • Speak the truth in love (Eph. 4:15).
  • “Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you ought to answer each person” (Col. 4:6).
  • “Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear” (Eph. 4:29).
  • “Anxiety in a man’s heart weighs him down, but a good word makes him glad” (Prov. 12:25).
  • “I tell you, on the day of judgment people will give account for every careless word they speak, for by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned” (Matt. 12:36–37).
  • “Death and life are in the power of the tongue,and those who love it will eat its fruits” (Prov. 18:21).

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