Let’s Talk About Sex

Last week in our Upper School chapel, I spoke to our students about Sexual Purity. The week before, Greg Scheck, our Upper School principal, talked about Purity. He laid a foundation for purity of thoughts and actions. We have been on a journey this year at NCCS exploring Matthew 6:33 and the idea of “SEEKING”.

The purpose of our messages on purity was to let our students know that along the way, there will be temptations that have the potential to distract them from “Seeking” Christ. Several folks have asked for the verses that I used and some of the statistics that I shared. I have pasted the text of my message below.

“Let’s Talk About Sex”
North Cobb Christian School
April 18, 2007
Megan Strange

[Title Slide with audio “Let’s Talk About Sex”]
[begin with clip of “Let’s Talk About Sex” by Salt and Pepa]

Alright…Let’s Talk About Sex. How many of you recognized that song? Even if you didn’t recognize it, you laughed. I’ve heard that there are two reasons why people laugh. Either you think it is funny or you are very uncomfortable. Why did you laugh? This morning some of you are absolutely terrified of the idea of me standing up here talking to you about sex. Can I level with you? I am too. Most of the teachers are out there laughing at me right now. Most of my fellow staff can tell you that I am always the first one to get embarrassed in a situation that even borders on sexuality. That is why it is so humorous that I volunteered to do this talk. But, let’s be honest…we’re all talking about it. In fact, by this time in the day, you have either thought about sex or had a conversation about it. Maybe you haven’t had a real in-depth conversation about it, but you have at least made a comment or heard a comment that could be construed as having sexual overtones.

The song that I played coming up here is called “Let’s Talk about Sex” by a hip-hop group called Salt and Pepa. They wrote that song in the 90’s in response to the number of teenagers that were sexually active. The message of the song is that we need to talk about what is going on. Let’s quit treating sex as something that we avoid talking about until someone has found themselves in a bad situation. So today, we are going to talk about sex.

The Today Show did a survey not too long ago that stated that nearly 27% of all students age 13-16 are “sexually active”. Keep in mind that means having sexual intercourse or any other variety of sex-related activities. The Today Show asked them why teenagers were having sex. Here are a few of the reasons they cited: peer pressure, looking for love, the media portrays it as fun, and they wanted to keep their boyfriend/girlfriend.

The study also showed that a number of students are waiting to have sex until they get married. They cited a number of reasons why they are waiting. Some of the reasons are: respect for their parents, goals for their future, fear of getting a disease, and fear of pregnancy. I am standing up here today talking to you because as a 16 year old high school student, someone presented me with another option. I prayed to receive Christ on June 23, 1994 the summer before my junior year in high school. Some friends invited me to go to church with them. I got involved in their church and attended their summer youth camp. During that week, God convicted me of my sins and showed me that true forgiveness can only come in the form of Jesus Christ living in my heart and being the Lord and Savior of my life. I learned in that moment of salvation that God had a better plan for my life.

That fall, our youth pastor talked to us about True Love Waits. True Love Waits is a program designed to teach students that God created sex and He intended it to be enjoyed within the confines of marriage. That all sounded great to me, so I decided that I could make the True Love Waits commitment. It seemed easy enough at the time to sign on the line and to ask my friends to hold me accountable. That was in October 1994. I want to fast forward with you to August 2003…

[Wedding Video Clip 24:28-25:50]

I show you that to show you that I really value the idea of waiting until marriage. I was the youth minister at Acworth United Methodist Church when Clint and I got married. Over the 5 years that I was there, I had an opportunity to take different groups of our high school students through the True Love Waits program. On my wedding day, I wanted to show them just how important that commitment was to Clint and I. I can stand up here and tell you with all honesty that I did not have sex until I got married. It can be done. I did not say it was easy, I just said it can be done.

We are not the first generation to struggle with the idea of sexual purity.

[Slide with verse]

2 Samuel 11:1-5 In the spring, at the time when kings go off to war, David sent Joab out with the king’s men and the whole Israelite army. They destroyed the Ammonites and besieged Rabbah. But David remained in Jerusalem.
One evening David got up from his bed and walked around on the roof of the palace. From the roof he saw a woman bathing. The woman was very beautiful, and David sent someone to find out about her. The man said, “Isn’t this Bathsheba, the daughter of Eliam and the wife of Uriah the Hittite?” Then David sent messengers to get her. She came to him, and he slept with her. (She had purified herself from her uncleanness.) Then she went back home. The woman conceived and sent word to David, saying, “I am pregnant.”

Remember that this is King David, a man after God’s own heart. King David is a man that many of our guys want to grow up to be like. Sexual purity was an area he struggled in. Even as strong and mighty as King David was, he was very weak in this area.

[Slide with verse]

2 Corinthians 12:9 has some good news for us, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore, I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.

Let’s face it…sexual purity is an area that everyone struggles with in some shape or form. The reason we want to have this conversation is because we are all talking about it. Just last week I saw a new Facebook group that some of our students are joining. It is called “I’m saving myself for hot, passionate, awkward, honeymoon sex”. I think that is great! Please know that it is cool to wait. You do not have to cave in to what the world is offering you. God does have a better plan regarding sex.

[Slide with verse]

I Peter 5:8 “Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.”

[Slide with verse]

Psalm 34:5 “Those who look to him are radiant; their faces are never covered with shame.”

[Slide with verse]

Psalm 119:9-11 How can a young man keep his way pure? By living according to your word. I seek you with all my heart; do not let me stray from your commands. I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you.

[Slide with verse]

2 Corinthians 10:5 We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.

[Blank slide]

Those are just a few verses that speak to the fact that God wants us to constantly look to Him. The world is constantly presenting options to us that will cause us to stumble. The world would have you to believe that all teenagers are having sex. It’s the “cool” thing to do. You don’t have to look far to see sex portrayed in the media. If you look at some of the top shows on TV right now…sex is one of the major themes. What are the top movies right now? Can you think of a sex scene in them? How many of you have heard the Nickelback song “The Animals” or how about Keith Urban “Tonight I Want to Cry?” I don’t think it would take too long for us to come us with a list of songs, shows, or movies that have sex as one of the underlying themes. What if we as Christians said that we aren’t going to support that anymore? What if we just said, enough is enough! I refuse to continue to pay $xxxx to see this movie full of trash. Seems sort of strange to think about. We continue to pay money to see these movies, tune into these TV shows, and listen to these songs. We have helped create the culture of sex in the media just by going along with what is out there.

God has called us as Christians to be revolutionaries. I have mentioned the movie Amazing Grace to y’all on several occasions the past couple of months. Amazing Grace is a movie that tells a story about one man, William Wilberforce, that took a stand to make a difference. He went on a crusade in the late 1700’s to put an end to the slave trade in England. He had been so captivated by the love of God, that he just couldn’t bear the way the slaves were being treated any longer. The movie shows the journey that he went on. He didn’t have it easy, it took some time for him to get a team around him that would help him convince the English Parliament that it was time for a change.

What are you doing to change the world around you? Do you believe that God has called you to impact the culture? What if God wants to use you to change the world’s view that all teenagers are having sex?

How have I formed my opinions and values concerning purity? First of all, the Bible.

[Slide with verse]

2 Timothy 2:22 Run from anything that stimulates youthful lust. Follow anything that makes you want to do right. Pursue faith, love, and peace, and enjoy the companionship of those who call on the Lord with pure hearts.

[Blank slide]

Second, there are tons of resources available to help you learn more about why purity is important. Here are just a few that have been really valuable to me over the past few years…
[Slide for each book]

1. Lady in Waiting
2. Pure Excitement
3. I Kissed Dating Goodbye
4. Boy Meets Girl
5. Don’t Date Naked
6. Love, Sex, and Lasting Relationships
7. Hedges

[Blank slide]

Third, I have some friends that hold me accountable to what I look at online and how I spend my alone time. Mr. Scheck said last week that one area people struggle with a ton is their thought life. Do you have someone who can honestly ask you…what are you thinking about? The focus of your thoughts very quickly becomes the focus of your heart and then it becomes an action.

[Slide with verse]

2 Corinthians 10:5 We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.

Even though this can be an awkward conversation, I think it is very important that we as Christians approach this subject with the desire to become all that God created us to be. A think a little awkwardness is worth it if it causes us to make smarter decisions concerning our sexuality. I am up here because I love you. Your teachers and the staff here love you, that is why we are here. We want the very best for you. Don’t settle for what this world has to offer regarding sex, save yourselves for God’s very best.

I want to close this morning asking you the same questions that Mr. Scheck closed with last week.

[Slide with questions]

1. Are you willing to make a commitment to be pure in thought and deed?
2. Are you willing to pay the price socially to be pure?

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